Swine Flu Public Service Announcement

Press Release from a hamlet in the Hamburg health region:

RE- H1N1 Influenza
There has been a lot of media reports regarding the severity of the H1N1 Influenza virus which has made some people are scared like-it's the Bay of Pigs all over again. We would like to reassure you that most of the news is a lot of hogwash. If you do go see the doctor don't be pig-headed about it or ham it up when they are looking at your symptoms. While it is true that some doctors will give out oinkment if you break out in rashers or your skin has a strange pigmentation in most cases nothing can be done - dr's can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear you know and you would just be casting your pearls before swine. In fact they would be happy as a pig in mud if you didn't come in at all.
Our advice is if contracting H1N1 will prevent you from bringing home the bacon try to put some money in your piggy bank so you don't end up in hock. Also try relaxing: throw the pigskin around, take a spin on your Hawg, or if you live in a pig-sty clean it up, eat lots of comfort food (such as piggies in a blanket, pork rinds,back bacon, etc) - just don't pig out or hog all the food. And dont' believe all the emails you read about swine flu - it is probably just spam.
Th-th-that's all folks!

~Friday~Funnies~Top Ten ways the Conversion Team made their 'Go decision'

Well, what a week we have had since the eroworks conversion! It is my understanding that it was a really tough decision* to go ahead with the conversion and they had to use all the resources at their disposal. . . including some unusual ones. . .

Top Ten Resources used by the Conversion Team to make the 'Go decision' Last weekend

10. Magic 8 Ball said 'Outlook is good'

9. Figured with all the snow nothing else could go wrong.

8. Asked themselves "What would Captain Kirk do? "

7. Saying no would have made MR. CEO miss his Tee time.

6. Advice was favorable from the Psychic Hotline (Side Note - How come you never see the headlines -Psychic wins lottery?)

5. Inspired by Rocky music - figured they could take on anything.

4. Played Bunny Bingo and won.

3. Asked themselves "What would Bill Gates do?"

2. Planets were in line.

1. Go? What do you mean 'Go'? We said No!

Happy Friday Everyone!

* In actuality, last weekend the conversion went so smooth that it was very easy for the team to decide to go ahead. They even made the call ahead of schedule. Way to go Team!

Top 10 Symptoms for flu's eerily similar to the swine flu

The 'Swine Flu' has been in the news a lot lately but here in Saskatchewan you are more likely to get Canuck fever than Swine Flu (at least I hope!). But here are some symptoms of flu's other than the Swine Flu that you should watch out for:



10. You went for wing night at the bar and can't remember how you got home (this is a symptom of the wine flu)


9. You treat women badly. (This is the Chauvinist Pig Flu)


8. If thou hast the urgeth to speaketh unto olde English - you have the Thine Flu.


7. You feel the urge to use cheesy pick-up lines ( 'what's your sign? flu')


6. You feel the urge to karate chop a board with your head ( Kung Flu )


5. You must wear a Fez and go to a convention.(Shrine(r)'s flu)


4. You won the President's trophy but get your lunch handed to you by an 8th place team ('this is the Spine(less)' flu or aka Shark Flu)


3. The Toronto Maple Leafs won the Stanley Cup last year (Oh wait. . . that's when pig's flew NOT flu)


2. Need to wear cowboy shirts with fake jewelrey (Rhine(stone) Flu )


1. You cannot remember how to do trigonometry . . . wait for it . . . the 'sine flu').



Happy Friday everyone!